Suicide awareness

Some cold hard facts.....

• Statistically, every 40 seconds, someone in the world completes suicide
• That's over 1 million people every year
• Over the past 45 years, the rates of completed suicide have increased by 60%
• In Australia, more people die from suicide than they do skin cancers or road related accidents.  It is also the leading cause of death of males under the age of 44, and women under 34. 
• In the UK, more males die from suicide than they do HIV, road accidents & assaults combined.
• China has one of the world's most horrifying statistics of 287,000 people dying by suicide annually (with approximately 2 million attempting). And yes, it is the leading cause of death between the ages of 15-34.
• It has been reported that Lithuania has the highest rate of suicide globally. Alcohol has a lot to do with it, no doubt caused by financial & social issues in the region.

Had enough? Yeah... me too..

What can we do?
TALK!! raise awareness, ask questions and care for your friends & family.  Suicide is preventable IF the suicidal person allows help (they often don't). What we can do is admit that society isn't functioning at peak condition, this is cause for great distress. Hiding or denying the facts do not help anyone. For every completed suicide there are at least 7 people directly effected, greatly. Considering the statistics above, that is a heck of a lot of grieving people out there! Some cope, some do not. 

Does it matter when people take their own lives?
You bet it does! It might be their "choice" in that particular moment however, it is never a moment where things are logical or clear. We have all had that moment where we cannot see a way out of our troubles, in the eye of the suicidal this becomes reality. 

Wednesday May 29th is wear white to work day - in memory and support of those affected by suicide.

Want to read more?
More info on wearing white to work on May 29
The World Health Organisation on suicide
International Suicide Prevention Hotlines
Suicide - warning signs
Bereaved by suicide? Join a supportive group to share your story with others

My story.....
In mid 2009, I lost the absolute love of my life to suicide.
The following two years I lost myself. I'm much better now but the memory is with me every single day.
Life has never been the same since. It never will be. I am a changed woman. Sometimes bitter, often emotional. I have good days and really really shitful days.
Through various support networks I have made some amazing friends and I cannot imagine my life without them.  My eyes have been opened in ways I do not wish upon others.
Today? It is as it is. I still do not understand how this happened in my life but I accept that it did. I am grateful for amazing friends.  
I do wonder about falling in love with the 'wrong' people. Do certain folk do that? Are some people attracted to those they cannot save? to those they cannot have? Personally, I don't have the answers, I never regret my time with my beloved, not for one minute. I miss him every day.

Support your loved ones today and every day. x

grace

What does Grace say to you? For me she is many things, but I wonder what she is for you....

increscunt animi, virescit volnere virtus (the spirit grows, strength is restored by wounding)

To quote Nietzsche :
"To stay cheerful when involved in a gloomy and exceedingly responsible business is no inconsiderable art; yet what could be more necessary than cheerfulness? Only excess of strength is proof of strength"

Why is it that we fully experience ourselves when in the extreme?
Have you ever wondered why it is that strength is built upon the once shakiest of all foundations? It almost needs to be exhumed from us when we are at our most vulnerable. Is it something we are born with or without? The ability to face our own selves and perhaps not like what we might discover. 

Even Jesus and Buddha believed that suffering was to be experienced and only a transformation of the heart could turn things around. It is beyond our own intelligence, something which we cannot control. Personally, I am thankful for my suffering, it has opened my eyes and my heart to things I might never have seen had they not occurred. This wasn't always my view...

The TV tells us that we will be happier if - we lose weight, have more money, have a better car, have an attractive spouse (a media definition of attractive, that is), can be the best at something, work hard, play hard, wear this or that and basically cram our lives with meaningless crap. Sadly, it is a trap that everyone falls into at one stage or another. Not because we are easily brainwashed or stupid but because we are vulnerable and we are busy (often stressed), we are looking for that instant hit of success over the suffering. We are told to avoid suffering at all cost, crying is weak and to "pull our socks up" to get on with things.
Does life hold such little meaning that we value it on the exterior?
How does anyone have a transformation of the heart with only these modern suggestions?

Loyalty and guilt tells us we should be the ideal son/daughter, friend, lover, spouse, employee and neighbour. Where is anyone's heart in all of those labels? It is always rewarding to do something for someone we love however, do we do that at our own peril? Does seeing another's suffering hurt us more than our own suffering? How does any of this help anyone with a change of heart?

Through experiencing one's own pain or seeing it through another's eyes, a life lesson can be learned. It is in the darkness that we remember that first glimmer of light.  It is doubtful that without the darkness that one would or could appreciate the experience.  And what might that glimmer of light be? It could be a thought, an awakening, a friend, an idea, a book, a song. It can be anything and this is what gives birth to the transformation of the heart.


 

Blind leading blind
Never hear the laughter
Search through time
Nothing reveals the answer
If it's truth that you're looking to find
It is nowhere outside of your mind
I bide my time
Waiting for your change of heart...

 Essra Mohawk, Cyndi Lauper

the present of presence

Today I received a message from a dear friend that she had got me a gift to say thank you for being there for her. Yay! I love presents! (who doesn't?) but it got me thinking about what I really miss in my life today, and that is the presence of some pretty awesome important people.  Some of these people have since departed this realm and others I assume are too busy, distracted or perhaps just tired.  All reasons can be validated as life is what it is for the individual at any given time. However....

I began thinking about how as a society we sometimes buy presents to make up for our anti-presence. Mother's Day is upon us this weekend in Australia, and I'm fairly certain that most people will be hitting the stores for the perfect "thank you Mum, i love you" gift.  I'm not a Mother but I would love to hear from Mums - is there the perfect gift out there that validates all your hard work OR would you rather the present of presence from your offspring? (Not going to mention that entire "the TV creates the expectation of a material item on certain occasions" notion)

If we didn't purchase presents for birthdays and holidays and simply made ourselves present for these special occasions, would your friends and/or family be offended? upset? Maybe it is something we all need to think about.  We are all here for a certain amount of days and there is no greater gift than that of friendship. I know what I would choose, do you?......