Monday 20 July 2015

insidious deciduous

the apathy insidious
how could i care?
in August deciduous
why did you dare?

i'm no longer furious
I've seen it all before
it's seasonally tedious
walking through this door




with anniversary #6 upon me, today i have found myself floored. my usually sarcastic witty self has stepped aside while the apathy has taken centre stage.  this is what happens a few days before my birthday every year now. because it was 10 days after my 35th birthday that everything changed. forever. the anniversary of a beloved to suicide is shitful (for lack of a better word).  it always will be.  

of course, not everything is bad these days, actually my life is probably the best it has been in a very long time but the challenges i face pull at my heartstrings and i tire easily. X

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